Immaturity Lurks In Unexpected Places

It was a peaceful Sunday morning. The sun was peeking out from behind the winter clouds, the snow was glistening on the lawn, the coffee was exceptionally tasty and I was finishing up with my morning routine and looking forward to meeting with a group of internet marketers. I had found them through an internet marketing forum, where the leader had posted a message about wanting to gather varied marketers to discuss current trends, what works & what doesn't, SEO, current projects and experiments and more. They were going to meet via Skype and use it for text chat rather than video. I prefer a different type of forum, but I'm all for trying something new. So I joined the Group.

I logged on to Skype and found a conversation in the Group taking place. And it looked promising. A member was testing a sales page for a product he owns. The product was good. The sales copy very good. He was testing a WordPress plugin for a pop up and was stuck on what he should focus on in the pop up. Initially it was an entrance pop up, but the group soon convinced him he was better off using it as an exit. A great discussion ensued regarding the information he should collect in the exit. It got down to two options: survey the exiting visitor or capture their email address. Before a final ‘vote' was made on which was the best option, the conversation deteriorated.

The Children Have Arrived

SkypeGroupSEOBumsComments about an online scammer/spammer who made millions, lost millions, then made them again – viewed as a success.

Proud to show off a spammy website that is ranking in Google. Offers no value to visitors, but it ranks!

Nothing is wrong if it works.

Initial compliment regarding the directness of a comment that quickly became comments about toilet usage.

Followed immediately by: tell us all you know so that we can make millions and we'll share it with you.

Then turned into ranting about someone's lack of success in marketing.

And no one returned to the original member's marketing need for which exit strategy to use.

Immaturity Is Not Attractive

BeforeYouAssumeImmaturity is making assumptions. It's having contempt prior to investigation. It's resorting to locker room behavior and being unable to show respect to a new person.

And it's very unattractive.

It could be why no one likes you. It could be why your group is staying small and on one is succeeding.

I have no interest in working with people that exhibit this behavior. None.

I much prefer working with people who are interested in being better today so that they will be successful tomorrow.

I have great interest in helping people succeed, and very little interest in trying to teach a juvenile how to be an adult.

Give me maturity over age any day and I'll show you a Group of people that are working toward being successful in business and in life.


Edited to add my final response and farewell to the Group:





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0 thoughts on “Immaturity Is Not Attractive

  1. Hey, nice post!
    I really like your writing style. I definitely have the feeling that this was not a “pen and paper” post!
    I guess the only thing that I could add to this post is that it’s fine to dislike any persons poor behavior, as long as you maintain total respect for the person as a whole. Which you did nicely, and that’s so refreshing to see. Thanks for sharing this with us!

    1. Thanks, K! You’re right – not a “pen and paper” post. Definitely went straight from Skype to back end of the blog to write. I like your addition of “dislike any person’s poor behavior, while maintaining respect for the person as a whole” and am glad you saw that in the post. I tried to handle it all with a bit of class and told the group on Skype the following: “I believe I misunderstood the purpose of this group. I thought it was to share knowledge, help with projects by offering critiques or suggestions, and sharing what works & what doesn’t work. I wish you all much success – I’m leaving to find a group focused on being better than they were yesterday so they can be successful in business and in life.”

  2. Hi Charlene

    I personally run lots of groups pages and
    as soon as I see where one person is starting
    to create friction, I just say..

    Whats up with all the friction,
    and then ask them to stop by
    reminding them of the purpose of
    why they were part of it.

    If they won’t after, just as quick as they came,
    they vanish with a click of the

    remove from
    group button>>

    That was EZ..


    1. Oh yes, Bruce, that would happen if it were my group. In this case, I joined their group…then left it.

      1. Immaturity comes from unknown, different things can make people display their actions. Immaturity in business will eventually ground the battleship, cause if u start from scratch and build that business, it will succeed through our learned contributions to prevail. There is no facade in this rude and prejudice business world, I do know that immaturity causes unnecessary confusion and comlplications

        1. Nice phrase, Preston: immaturity in business will eventually ground the battleship. Thank you for sharing.

  3. I think you handled it perfectly, Charlene. I would have left a group like that as well. Although, I may have to disagree with the statement “Immaturity is Unattractive”… or at least add ‘in certain instances’, lol. Most men are immature, especially the ones with a good sense of humor. It keeps us young, and the women who married us 😉

    1. Thank you, Dr. Steve. And I agree that most men are immature (or can be) but if you think about it…just how immature were you BEFORE you married your wife compared to now? Yeah, that’s what I thought. About like my husband…no real signs of immaturity until AFTER we were married. Then I was hooked and able to overlook 😉 ROFL

  4. Charlene, I appreciate your story as it illustrates what we do find in part of this Industry. The good news is there are many awesome marketers to meet. I agree we no longer have time for the nonsense(delete) “Next!” Love your writing style.

    1. Tom, you are so right! There are many awesome marketers to meet. I know many myself. Thank you.

  5. Charlene, thanks for sharing this interesting experience. I once heard a quote along the lines of ‘what you accept in your presence becomes your standard.’ It seems that group tolerates this behavior you’ve described and I’m hearing that was not a fit for you. Kudos to sticking with your standards.

  6. What a frustrating experience! I know I get friend requests daily from people I have never met, and when I look at their profile and it says “Internet Marketer” I usually wait until they send me a message before I approve their equest. Sometimes, I’ll just approve them on faith- and every time I do, I’ll get a message moments later asking what I do for a living. Can you say, “DELETE and BLOCK”?? Spammers, and head-hunters (people who recruit through shady tactics) have no place in my business. I’m glad you took a stand in that group and you left with kinder words than I would have used. Way to be classy, Charlene! Great story and content, as usual! 😀

    1. Thank you, Tamara! Yes, frustrating because it continues. I’ve been seeing this crap for 20 years 🙂

  7. Great post Charlene. I would have left the group too. People who act that way are insecure in themselves so they have to make others look bad to make them look good. The problem with that is it doesn’t work it just makes them look bad.

  8. Charlene, I also do not have much patience for people who are immature and ruin conversations like that. In your example, it was completely rude for those types of people to start bickering among each other while they completely strayed away from the original conversation topic.

    We should not only be mature in our dealings, but we should be considerate of others.

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